What does it mean to be a man? In Western society, we have focused heavily on the warrior aspect of the man – the strength, the doing mentality, and the blocking of deeper emotions. We’ve been raising boys with the belief that crying is weakness, that vulnerability is weakness. In today’s interview with Rowan Tyne, we dive into a new definition of masculinity.
In my own journey, I’ve been really diving back into rediscovering my feminine. It’s been a common theme in a number of my blog posts, on connecting with the moon cycle and embracing the feminine with Kelsey Lawrence. However, I truly feel that as important as it is for us to better understand the feminine, we must equally show respect to the masculine.
The true essence of masculinity has been stripped away by societal norms. This is why our men are hurting, and in turn, hurting the women around them. To me, we must honor both side of the spectrum – the feminine and the masculine. Both serve a divine purpose and both are within each one of us.
Meet Rowan Tyne
Rowan is an incredible photographer, media producer, and world traveler. I was lucky enough to have met him at a networking event here in Bali. When we met for lunch, we immediately bonded as we discussed our personal journeys. Similar to my own story, Rowan hit darkness at a very young age, slipping into a deep depression, drug abuse, and suicidal thoughts.
As we dig into this story in the interview, we both realize the connection of this darkness with our rejection of what made us who we were as children. Being taught that is wasn’t okay to show emotion, Rowan began to hide parts of himself.
I told myself that is wasn’t safe to be myself, that I had to be someone else to be accepted. I had to be somebody else to fit in and belong.– Rowan Tyne
After years of feeling the numbness of depression and the exhaustion of trying to fit into a persona of someone he wasn’t, Rowan realized he had to make a subconscious decision. He hit a wall on his path of destructive behavior.
I hit this point of realizing I can either give up, or I can commit to my life. I can either actually kill myself like I’ve been thinking about, or I can actually turn everything around.– Rowan Tyne
This is a pivotal moment that we all have, on some level. When we are finally ready to fall into a growth journey or a spiritual journey, we first have to hit a rock bottom. We have to decide that the scary process of stepping forward into the unknown is better than staying broken where we are.
This led Rowan to amazing support groups and mentors who helped him to bring back the pieces of himself that he had shunned away for so long. His spiritual journey also included the unknown of traveling abroad, diving head first into new and scary territory.
I’m still in the process of reclaiming (myself) and stripping away the layers, but that’s the beautiful practice, the beautiful work. It’s a slow remembrance of who we really are.– Rowan Tyne
Redefining the Masculine: Interview
Let’s dive into Rowan’s story with an open mind on how we can see our own masculinity (and femininity) within ourselves.
Some of the questions to consider when watching this interview:
- What gender norms were placed on you throughout childhood?
- Can you identify parts of your personality you disconnected from to belong or fit in?
- How can you embrace a different definition of what it means to be a man or a woman?
What is the Divine Masculine?
There are a lot of things that is not masculinity, as they’re symptoms of fear and how they present themselves in a male form. In a desire to fit in, there is a part of the masculine that leans towards controlling, aggressive, and dominating. This is the opposite of what it means to be embracing the true side of masculinity, which is more focused on protecting, leading, and serving others.
Rowan references a book on male archetypes, called King, Warrior, Magician, Lover by Robert More and Douglas Gillette. These archetypes layout a solid foundation of why it looks like to be a man who fully embraces what it meant to be in the masculine and feminine, without the fear-based tendencies.
The King is the of service, not coming from an ego or self-centered place. He is the highlight of leadership and duty, of bringing people along on the journey with him.
The Warrior is the archetype that embodies the male sense of purpose and courage. Purpose is an important piece to the puzzle here, as courage alone can bring a lot of the destruction that we see in hyper masculinity today. Purpose helps the warrior to connect deep within himself and keeps him grounded.
Check out the rest of the interview for amazing knowledge drops.
Connecting with Rowan
If this conversation really sparked something within you, especially for the men out there, I highly suggest you get in touch with Rowan. You can keep up with his inspiring posts and short videos by following him on Instagram @Rowantyne. I also encourage you to check out his YouTube Channel or reach out to him on Facebook.
He mentions one of the Podcasts he is involved with called The Rising Man Podcast. According to their site, this podcast is a platform where amazing men from all walks of life come to share their personal stories about the journey from boy to man, the challenges, triumphs, and insights they’ve experienced, and what they’ve learned along the way. I definitely plan to check it out!
Let’s keep the conversation going
We would love to know about your ideas of what it means to be embracing masculinity or femininity. Did any of this conversation question your beliefs? Was there anything you didn’t agree with?
Please comment below and let’s embrace the conversation together.
Stay tuned for even more incredible interviews coming out soon 🙂